I used to be like that but I got a grip. I am now acutely aware of when I am at risk of slipping back into this habit. You've explained it so well and the origin of where it comes from (boredom). You don't want drama in your life, like I've had - believe me! You're taking great responsibility and have excellent insight. Developing hobbies etc is very positive and constructive antidote against boredom.

Yes, being on Medium can help with feeling alone. It's like there is always someone to connect with. You're starting the new year on a great note Sheamus. I wish you every great success in 2025 and I believe you will be successful. Let's make this year a great one, and support our community on Medium and great writers like yourself. You're not alone. You have us all here!

I sincerely hope you find a suitable place to live in a safe area. I know it's very tough living in the situation you are in, and sorry for harping on about age. But one thing I would advise (as I once made this mistake and regretted it later). Don't move out of your home impulsively. You could move to a much worse situation and it will be too late. Try to hold on until you find somewhere that is suitable.