Thank you! Yes, there is such a lot not understood with adoption, the incredible feeling of loss that extends to everything in life. I've now come to terms with that more. I do know some information about my birth parents but the law in this country, Ireland prevented adoptee's until last year finding out full early birth information for both parents. Historically it was the birth mother that tracing focussed on. Many years ago I found out I had 2 half siblings on mother's side and met them, although my mother was deceased. Unfortunately this didn't go great, and over time we all lost contact. There was a lot of blame and they didn't know who my birth father, and it's all very complicated! I won't go into it here but I saw photos of my mother and at least met my half sisters. I only found about my birth father last year, who is long deceased, so both were deceased before I was able to find out more. At least knowing the information is good, but I will never know what actually happened as it was very complicated and in that era there was enormous secrecy and shame. The Catholic church had enormous power also and women were made very afraid to ever contact their children.